Wednesday, February 29, 2012

thoughts

cant decide if the world is big or small.
feels intimidatingly small.... and then
sometimes i visit google maps just to remind me how wrong i am.
there is a world full of people out there.
people who don't know of my existence or my family's or my history or my name.
people who don't know about my city, my town, my county, maybe even my state.
it's crazy how engulfed i have become in my life.
in the simple aspects of it all....
school, homework, friends, sleeping, eating, computer, tv.
i have done nothing worth any serious honorable mention, and although i know i'm young it feels a little uncomfortable knowing just how easily and quickly my name could fade.
feeling as if im a robot falling some sort of "correct" routine.
i know school is supposed to prepare you for your future, but all it has been doing recently has been keeping me busy. keeping me occupied. keeping me stressed and exhausted.
sometimes i dont have time to think .... really think. any free time is spent on the computer or watching tv or talking to a friend or scrambling around cute boys.
my life is full of distractions and writing a simple thoughtful blog has been out of the question recently...
i dont know, i guess i have come to the realization that life moves so fast, sometimes it's difficult to get past the everyday normal bare-minimum type thinking and really think.... genuinely think about what i have been spending all my time on and whether it's really worth it. or more so just to give myself a chance to look at the big picture. i think this is an aspect people often forget to do; giving yourself time to look at the big picture.
whatever your big picture is.
regardless of whether you're able to see it clearly... or even at all.
everyone needs at least five minutes a day to turn off their routine and think
think outside the box society provides for us.....
a box full of distractions meaningless tasks; entertaining they may be... but it's time to recycle

Tuesday, February 28, 2012

unthinkable

moment of honesty
someones got to take the lead tonight
who's going to be?

i was wondering maybe could i make you my baby

either way im saying
if you ask me, im ready.

if we're going to do something bout it, we should do it right now.

______
stuck in head.
too much hw im going vomit
needa clean it up
ima use some comet
get ready bitches
this aint a mutha fuckin sonnet
oh
sik wid it



haha

Monday, February 27, 2012

why is everything so difficult?
why is everything so time consuming?
why am I always so tired?
why cant summer be year round?
im confused
wait am i really confused?
me?
confused.....
no.
yes?
i dont know....





























whatever

Sunday, February 26, 2012

so many split ends
sitting on your shoulders
taunting us,
teasing us
this is a joke
be gone
three snips
the end
too many split ends
why cant you get your shit together
try
do something
so many fucking split ends
tie them back together or cut them off
i want your hair to keep growing
long and fruitful
shining and proud
i want you to be proud.
ambitious.
like caesar
i want a fucking riot of people to scream your name
in damnation or love
loud.
at the top of their lungs,
louder.
we never finished anything
and yet you sit her blatantly naive
like the trees we carved half our names in
they had no idea of our injustice
where did you go?
there are wholes in your shoes
and stitches in the pants you gave me

Friday, February 24, 2012

tired, tired, go away, never fucking come back or I'll sleep all my days away......
parents aren't fighting, parents are fighting, parents aren't fighting, parents are fighting. yes, no, yes, no, fighting, best friends, fighting again, best friends yesterday, and today my dad left

Monday, February 13, 2012

im drowning

rescue me from this pool of complete and utter indifference.....
or don't.
I could care less either way.

Saturday, February 11, 2012

lip sync season over....
i feel as if high school is ending way too fast.

Sunday, February 5, 2012

sun burnt face.
unfinished homework.
upset stomach.
chill music.
lazy attitude.
tired eyes.
tired soul.