Friday, December 31, 2010

Goodnight 2010

Last day of twenty ten was and will be sadly nothing extravagant. Everyone have a safe and amazing new year. :)

Wednesday, December 29, 2010

Tuesday of my break was....

Chris's birthday party and then playing call of duty with Kenny for 20 hours.
The end.

I'm at this again......
*Best friend.
*Close friend.
HI CUTIE MWAH :-* LOVE YOUUUUUUU. Thanks for the present. ;)

Thanks for you being awesome enough for me to buy you one. Love you.

*Close friend.
You can be pretty awesome sometime.... I like you.

I love you.

Your turn..... leave me something, tell me a story, ASK ME A QUESTION:

Monday, December 27, 2010

Don't Trust Anyone

People will always be shady.
Just learn that there is literally no one but you and Jesus.
People will always fucking leaving you.
No matter what.
Get used to it....... I am.

1. What did you do in 2010 that you'd never done before?

2. Did you keep your new years' resolutions?
I'm in better shape, or I was a week ago... breaks kinda screw me over when it comes to fitness.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?

4. Did anyone close to you die?
no :)

5. What countries did you visit?

8. What was your biggest achievement(s) of the year?
Moving on with my life. Playing cod on veteran, and surviving.

9. What was your biggest failure?
Not taking advantage of opportunities at hand.. oh and I hid my emotions... scary good... like a pro... like a boss

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
I was punched in the face... it's actually not as bad as I anticipated

11. What was the best thing you bought?
I don't know why but I bought my friend a painting for Christmas just the other day and I think I was more excited about it then he was... it just had so much thought!! I rule sometimes!!!!!

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
Me for buying that painting ^ hahaha just kidding ;) I'd have to commend everyone who put up with my antics this year. Friends played a big role in my life this year..

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
I try not to blame others intentions/actions on my feelings, sure they may have effected them, but I like to find comfort in believing my emotions answer to no one

14. Where did most of your money go?
I went through a period where I believed the only thing to do on a weekend was watch a 10 dollar movie and buy some routine meal at a poor lit restaurant across the way

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
I get really, really, really, excited about lots of things... This question holds no superior authority in this case, at least not for 2010 (that I can remember right now anyhow)

16. What song will always remind you of 2010?
Frozen Creek (Hahahah good timessssssss)

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
a) happier or sadder? Happier but only because this last year I was in a fucked up state of mind. It's funny because 2009 was such a paradox, so of the best and worst times of my life all rolled up into this one.
b) thinner or fatter? Thinner.... but I weigh more, because I work out at 7 every morning
c) richer or poorer? Poorer. I was homeless in some recent intervals of this year..

18. What do you wish you'd done more of?
I didn't go to Disneyland as much as last year, ummmm I wish I read more... nah that's lame I wish I hugged longer and not gave a shit longer

19. What do you wish you'd done less of?
Complaining and eating

20. How will you be spending Christmas?
Already spent with my refreshed family relationships, and even found out I have an awesome cousin in law ahhaha

21. Did you fall in love in 2010?

22. How many one-night stands?

23. What was your favorite TV program?
Fringe and Rob Dydrek's Fantasy Factory

24. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?

25. What was the best book you read?
to kill a mockingbird

26. What was your greatest musical discovery?

27. What did you want and get? ops

28. What did you want and not get?
love in certain forms and more free time

29. What was your favorite film of this year?
Inception was pretty awesome.... partly because I watched it tonight and have a horrible memory

30. What did you do on your birthday?
This birthday wasn't that great actually... spent it with friends, got dressed up, and went to dennys hahahahaa watched an infamous friend's old video (bratrk)

31.What was one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
.....shut up

32. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2010?
......the 'whatever I felt like wearing that day' concept

33. What kept you sane?
Since when was I sane?

34. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
Clint Eastwood

35. What political issue stirred you the most?
Maybe the fake ass swine flu scare and 'Obama where is your birth certificate' campaign

36. Who did you miss?
Friends who drifted, but they're all back now so it's all good :)

37. Who was the best new person you met?
Hm.... Oscar is pretty great (when he wants to be) oh wait sorry oscar, Anis Mojgani

38. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2010.
Let's see FUCK IT....WHATEVER EVERYONE ELSE THINKS IS WRONG. Hahaha, just realize that all you have is yourself and Jesus when push comes to shove. DTA

39. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.
"I am young but no longer impressionable."
"You're the only proper noun I need."
"Fuck that old shit, I'm on new things."
"I ain't got a home, I'll forever roam."
"Everyone here is good tonight except the niggas that I came with, they good for life."
"I can't pay my rent, but I'm fucking gorgeous."
"And party, and bullshit, and party, and bullshit."

40. Any things you'd like to mention about 2010?
-Met Craig Owens.
-Set your goals at house of blues had the best set of your life.
-Lost friends, got back friends.
-Got Carolina the best birthday present ever... The poem reading was amazing.
-Partied with Anis Mojgani among other amazing poets.
-Hot boys are amazing, but the boys who will always be there are even better.. but the hot boys that will always be there are the best.
-Poetry & Writing = a newfound passion?
-Not giving a shit is the cure to any situation.
-When judging someone just keep in mind that you don't know what they've been through...
-Was homeless.
-Found out people care about you. Found out that people you didn't even knew cared for you, care for you.
-People come and go... what else is new. The people who always come back are loyal.
-Can now play call of duty on veteran. Sweeeeeeeet.
-You were in a school play.
-You died you hair brown.
-Went to New York / DC. Liked New York better.
-You walked a few miles with Carolina and got drenching, drenching wet. Don't walk to rite aid in long beach during a rain storm. You'll almost get killed by flying palm tree limbs. Actually... do it, it was fun.
-You will dance around after getting 3 stars on everything in a section of special ops on codmw2.
-You will never beat procrastination, might as well accept that now..
-You can be hot when you want to be.
-I seriously think wOw has like some additive something in it. It's weird...
-Things will be okay.
-There is no time for bullshit.

Pictures of 2010, because I want to:

...actually pictures & more later because it just went from 2 to 4 in a milla. For the record it's 4:20 am not whatever it says V (that's when it first saved)
Isn't it funny how things work out....


Because I know that this was all the confirmation I needed.

Today was pointless.
It's only days like these that make me feel disgusting.
I'm looking forward to summer already....

Sunday, December 26, 2010

It's one of those days

I guess I'll go to sleep now..

Saturday, December 25, 2010

Merry Jesus's birthday Day.
Love and love and love and love and love and love you. All.

Friday, December 24, 2010


Your iridescent smiles.
Your inconsiderate laughs.
Your unintentional gibes and hymns.
Your secrets of love and hate.
Your unmeasurable self proclaimed loathed, but undeniably loved, 'intelligence'.
Your capability only shines through intermittently.
You remind me of Hayley's comet.
Your bipolar personality swallows you whole under scrutiny of the respected species.
You make me sick.
Not because your real quintessence is malice..
because you are competent.
You are perfectly competent, and it bugs the shit out of me.
I hate you because I am unable to make my mind up about you.
My failure to place you in a single bracket of character kills me.
It kills me.
I catch myself wishing you never proved yourself, so I would have nothing to miss.
I wish I cared as much as this leads on.

(Purely inspiration...I promise)

On the contrary I'm having an awesome day!
Merry Christmas Eve everyone!
Love yall... forrreallll.
Can't wait to listen to Jessica's mix cd she made me.

Words of wisdom:

Monday, December 20, 2010

Sometimes it's okay to start over.
Sometimes it's okay to start fresh.
Take a deep breathe.
Life goes on.
You will be ok.
I promise.

Sunday, December 19, 2010

24 hours

People amaze me.
People disappoint me.
People love me.
People look down on me.
People get mad at me.
People laugh with me.
People laugh at me.
People leave me.
People talk to me.
People don't talk to me.
People want me.
People don't want me.

All in one day...
Appreciate what you have and who you have while you're able to.
The end.
The things you thought you didn't like will be the things you wish you could get back.
That's all.

Saturday, December 18, 2010

wrote this on the back of a rugby flyer the other day because my brain wouldnt let me sleep

I stopped trying to be pretty the day someone told me I was.
I live for laughs, but love it when I cry.
I run back to black when it's time to reflect.
I want to blend in with the asphalt I just picked my feet from.
I see nothing but sun.
I am nothing but walked upon.
I find all street rats and washed up road kill.
I blend in with everyone and everything;
no one ever looks at their own feet.
I am beat every time the rain falls,
listening to the cries of the child,
and home to the glass the broom left behind.
I do not talk,
but tell the stories.
My silence stabs harder then any word could.
The sun only sets on days you sleep early.

Thursday, December 16, 2010

Organizing my thoughts

I tried finishing my homework.
I really did.
I blasted music when I started falling asleep, tried seeking help so it would go faster, didn't go pee so my brain would stay alert, but....
didn't finish.
Another late assignment in for icps.
I'll be able to finish everything in 4th, but I still am disappointed...

I'll be putting up a wishlist soon... probably.
Sorry everyone, haven't gone shopping for anybody yet.
I'm tired.
Rugby was lame tonight.
People were lame tonight.
Highlight(s) of day: Gentlemen and the car ride home.
The end.
I'll be writing everyone letters during 4th as well... so maybe I can hand people a little something when they give me gifts. :)
Oh, caroling bright and early tomorrow.
Too lazy to find a festive outfit; I do think I'm going to buy star bucks for the occasion though. :)
Oh and then I just remembered the ASB party is tomorrow, and then I want to go to Carolinas hizhouse..........
Low(s) of the day: My phone being stolen, misplaced, or eaten. Forever a mystery...
I have a lot of mix cds to make..............

Let the fun begin.

Tuesday, December 14, 2010

My english homework.
Took me a year and a half.
I still win.
The end.

Sunday, December 12, 2010

The play is over.
I wonder if I'll ever do another one.
I wonder if I'll talk to these people again.
I wonder if I'll ever hang out with them again...
Probably not.
That's it....
I'm not sad.
Just reflecting...
It was a lot of work, and in the process I've grown to know and love and slap people along the way.

Parabolas (etc.) from Everynone on Vimeo.

As seen on WNYC's Radiolab

Saturday, December 11, 2010

The dark side of the moon

I just blinked so much that I had to cry
You impressed me
I feel like i know you, reading verses after verses and prose after prose.
you amaze me.
I want to love you.
Your love is like the dark side of the moon.
I will never see it; I can only imagine what if feels like.
Maybe it's cheese.
Maybe a mouse lives there and its trying to hide from us all so it can eat its home with out us seeing, so we don't have a chance to tell him no..
Tell me no.
I want to move on and go to sleep, strike another X on my calander and keep telling myself, 'I can't wait for next year.'
I can't wait for next year.
Pull the blankets down so I can see you.
I want to see you.
Bare down to the essence of your pure.
I want to feel you.
I want to read your mind and hold you till I die.
I want to know what you feel like before that mouse eats your insides..
Tell me I'm right because I'll never dream if you lie.
And tell me I'm wrong because I'll never speak if you don't.
My fingers tip tap till the sun comes up.
It's all the time I have.
I fear the sun because it looks so much like me.
Rises and sets.
Sets and rises.
It keeps looking and looking for the moon, but never finds it.
How can I get caught if I can't even smell the cheese on the mouse trap..
I can't wait for next year.

I think I'm coming undone.

I'm like a paper bag but the bottoms wet, it must be something bleeding internally inside..
I love when music makes me cry.
Gives me a glimpse of real.
As I turn up the vibes, telling myself its okay to clap to the pulse.
Show some heart because what you're hearing is pure feeling.
Close your eyes and trust the neighboring shoulders to hold you up.
Take it in.
Let it seep.
Close your eyes.
You might not get another feeling like this again.
It's nights like these I don't ever want to sleep.

Wednesday, December 8, 2010

Opening Night went by unbelievably fast. Thank you to everyone who came out or is going to come out. Love you all. Love everyone in the cast. Love everyone who helped make it happen. One down, three to go.

Tuesday, December 7, 2010

This time tomorrow I'll be getting ready for opening night...


This just got serious.

Monday, December 6, 2010

I have headache.
I am super tired.
I haven't started my homework.
I have a super big test tomorrow.
The play is this Wednesday, and I'm not ready..
I still have tickets to sell.
I'm always falling asleep during class.
I'm going to have a crap load of missing assignments by the end of this week because any spare time I have, I'll be sleeping..
If I wanted to go to bed a reasonable time, I would have no social life, so that establishes that..
I don't know what I'm going to eat for dinner...
My friend ignored my call, and the one who was supposed to be on the way to study isn't here yet.
This has been my life recently...
No breaks.
The end.
Might I add sleep is now purely for survival.

Saturday, December 4, 2010


1. What are your initials?

2. What is your favorite thing to wear?

3. Last thing you ate?

4. One place you will NEVER eat at?
....what kind of question is this?

5. I say Shotgun, you say:
grenade launcher

6. Last person you hugged?
uh.... bear actually haha

7. Does anyone you know wanna date you?
not that I know of....

8. Would you date anyone you met online?

9. Name something you like physically about yourself:

10. The last place you went out to dinner to?
Denny's w/ asb

11. Who is your best friend?
I have a few

12. What time of the day is it?
2:45 am

13. Who/What made you angry today?
ignorance and when tests are harder than you anticipated and homework

14. Baseball or Football?

15. Ever gone skinny dipping?

16. Favorite type of Food?

17. Favorite holiday:
Christmas / Halloween

18. Do you download music:
19. Do you care if your socks are dirty?
20. Opinion of Chinese symbol tattoos?

21. Would you date the person who posted this?
22. Has anyone ever sang or played for you personally?
Yes! I actually was to naive to know how to handle it..

23. Do you love anyone?
Life would be nothing in the absence of love.

24. Are colored contact lenses sexy?
they're fake

25. Have you ever bungee jumped?

26. Have you ever gone white-water rafting?
no... stop making me feel like a loser

27. Has anyone ten years older than you ever hit on you?

28. How many pets do you have?

29. Have you met a real redneck?
time for a good question

30. How is the weather right now?
I don't know why don't you go outside at 3 in the morning and let me know how it is..

31. What are you listening to right now?
rocket to the moon ..shuffle

32. What is your current favorite song?
I don't commit to favorites; changes every five seconds

33. What was the last movie you watched?

34. Do you wear contacts?

35. Where was the last place you went besides your house?

36. What are you afraid of?

37. How many piercings have you had?

38. What piercings do you want?

39. What's one thing you've learned this year?
What I learned today: Poke wholes through the rim of a gallon of paint so the left over paint drains instead of dripping down the side
Generic answer: Don't assume someone is a good/bad person until you know them.

40. What do you usually order from Starbucks?
carmel frap / white choc mocha. IM SO ORGINAL GUYS

41. What Magazines are you reading?
We're in a recession...
42. Have you ever fired a gun: no. watch bowling for columbine and get back to me

43. Are you missing someone? Yes, but we're going to be reunited very, very soon!

44. Favorite TV show?
Rob Dydrek's fantasy factory / fringe / ncis / modern family / before you die

45. Do you have an obession with WoW?
for the horde

46. Has anyone ever said you looked like a celeb?
various celebs or that i look familiar ... all the time

47. What celeb do you look like?
I've gotten.. ellen page (no), sam or whatever (no), umm ya I dont remember whatever

48. Who would you like to see right now?
Carolina, rocky, julio, justin bobby, young dicaprio, notebook ryan gosling, jake g

49. Favorite movie of all time?
I don't commit to favorites

50. Do you find yourself loved?
I consider my self loved.

51. Have you ever been caught doing something you weren't suppose to?
nooooo I havent

52. Favorite smell?

53. Butter, plain, or salted popcorn?
54. Ever put a friend in a cop car on YA every chance I get...

55. Ever been in a cop car in real life?
no in my fake life though

56. Has anyone you were really close to passed away recently?
no actually..

57. Our Lady Peace or Nickelback?
58. What's something that really bugs you or is bugging you right now?
Bad Friends / shy / i dont knows and i guess -es / hot boys not with me / homework / not having time for anything / not being confident with where i am with the play

59. Do you like Michael Jackson? 5
60. Taco Bell or Burger King? neither

61. What's your favorite perfume?
Daisy - mc

62. Favorite baseball team?
63. Ever call a 1-900 phone number?
64. Nipple or Nose rings?

65. What's the longest time you've gone without sleep?
what's sleep?

66. Last time you went bowling?
aww I want to go now!!!

67. Where is the weirdest place you have slept?
Abraham Lincolns memorial in dc

68. Who was your last phone call?

69. Last time you were at work?
school is work.
70. What's the closest orange object to you?
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