Tuesday, September 16, 2008

I'm sorry.

I got over it, like I knew I would. Always. Jog-Walk-a-thon is tomorrow. I should really run to get in shape for rugby but I don't want to stay in my PE clothes all day. Speaking of rugby, I don't know whats going on. It depresses me because I made a promise that I would do better this year, no matter what. I wonder when it's going to start...........if its going to start. I wonder if ------ is going to join. I truly hope she does, I miss her now, I know you do too. I wonder if I would miss you like I miss her. I don't know..we do fight alot. But now that I think of it I don't miss her that much, I mean.... I don't know what I mean. Maybe you are right about me. I think you are. No matter what I do, what we do, what you do, you always seem to push my buttons. Ughh, I hate that about you. This blog depresses me I don't think I'll reread it. Then again....

I wish I lived in a little cabin on open land with a city 15 minutes away. I wish I could run to my backyard and there would be no fence, no busy streets, no....no nothing. I wish my parents opened a savings account for me when I was 1 month old, so I wouldn't have to worry. I with Ledger didn't die. I wish I could have spent another ten minutes with grandma. I wish I gave my grandpa hug and gave him the time of day. I wish I met my other grandpa. The one family tells me I look like, the one that when they look at me they see him. I wish I had blue eyes. I wish I wouldn't have said that. I wish I said that. I wish I went on that ride when I had the chance. I wish I had the ability to make choices quick and accurately. I wish for once they would like me better. I wish they wouldn't know my name only because I was in your tagged photos. I wish I didn't care this much. I wish I wasn't clueless. I wish you cared what I think, what I thought. I wish you wouldn't think this is all about you, because for once its not. I regret ever telling you.I wish I went to church every Sunday. I wish ---- never showed you. I wish I knew it wasn't that big of a deal.

I wish you a Merry Christmas.

Sunday, September 14, 2008

I love

watching ----! Explosions' youtube videos!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!x132164341321327987654321

Friday, September 5, 2008

Just for you,

Friday, September 5
It could be a tough day for dealing with other people. They will be contrary and hypercritical, and you don't have the patience for dealing with quirky, childish behavior. If you can avoid being in public, or in large-group situations, that might ease your feeling of tension.

Good thing this isn't for tomorrow because I would never listen.

Monday, September 1, 2008



Don't change your classes!!!!

I think its time for an update,

I feel like the instinkers, I found some of their old mags, you know the ones with them on the cover in like space suits or jumps suits.....those ones. I worked hard today lifting boxes, going through boxes, water balloon fights, and giving hopeless creepy old Barbies makeovers. There is almost no furniture in my house right now and its getting me down. I brought Prom Night and Parenthood. I liked Parenthood better, not surprising.

I've been doing more stater runs on my bike, and I think my parents are starting to trust me more. Jessica bailed on me and I was pissed but we went later that day anyway.
------ pointed out that it was anyway and not anyways to me, I still say anyways I just try not too.

I went with Mary to Westminster to get her all settled for school.....awkward.
I never new that Pendergrass was the nurse, I go to school with ------.
So Mary will be starting Tuesday the day we get are phones. I'm excited. I got --------'s number too, I wonder if it's her cell.Well lets just say I'll be texting, ALOT.

I went to the corner bakery with Jessica after Boba to get a big bread roll, for one dollar no tax; I was amazed.
This girl cut me in line and got 2/3 of the biggies, I said excuse me you cut me, I was next, but she ignored me, that dirty hoe. Anyways I asked for the last one but it was broken in the middle and of course the lady that I got didn't speak English so I felt useless. So I said thank you anyways and put some money in the tip box for her trouble.

School is almost here and I don't feel ready. I should really be in bed right now but it would be useless. Even though I know have everything I need I feel like everything is happening to soon, too fast. I feel like the walls are closing in on me. I just want time to regroup. I want to have time to think. I don't want to grow up.

I watched a little of the Blair Witch Project, mad me so mad. I watched Raising Helen, always cheers me up....even though it's a depressing movie at first. I also watched a bit of The Others with Nicole Kidman, so....good.

I think I disappointed a lot of people down this summer saying that I would hang out with them and never did, but I'm sure I will some time.
Sorry -------,--------,------,and -------.

I think this is the longest blog I ever written, so far. I saw your comments yesterday, -------- and -------.